it's been a while since i last blogged, so this is probably gonna be a long entry i think. as most of you would know, val and i are busy with orientation, with different concerns of course. val is technically my superior in this case. she's what ms chen calls the planning committee and i am the executing committee.

been travelling all around singapore these few days without much help from bernie whom everyone seems to think i've been using to reach my destinations. well, that's not true. he's working 5 and a half days week which make it absolutely impossible for me to meet him during daylight. i get to see him only after six thirty on most days with that being the earliest. basically we hardly have time for each other anymore. add on a few more hours taking that as dinner and we both would prefer to be home in bed. he's tired, so am i. is this taking a toll on our relationship? i don't know. i don't have the time to think anymore. it's taken up by another activity. ORIENTATION.

i can't say i hate what i'm doing now, cos' i don't. it's tiring i admit but i saw it coming. it's taking a toll on my body though. i don't sleep right, eat right anymore. damn, i hardly even eat. if i didn't know myself any better i'd think i have a eating disorder. all these aren't the worse. the one that gets to me is that, people expect me to be at tons of places at one time. well, in case no one ever realises i can't do that. anyhow, i still try to satisfy everyone since what my limitations are aren't really taken into consideration. ah well, i won't talk bout orientation anymore for now, cos' i would like to pack my room up before thinking about designs.

next, i remember one of the few reasons as to why i hate to be in relationships. i find you lose the respect you work so hard to gain just because you happen to be so-and-so's girlfriend. some of you might feel my claims are unjustified but hey if you feel strongly about it, you are probably one of those who do that to me. it seems i am just made out to be one of the objects which my boyfriend possesses and i absolutely hate that. call me a stuck-in-the-mud but in case no one ever realises again i didn't need a boyfriend to begin with. i'll live. right now, i'm pissed too thinking bout all that was done to me by a particular someone. all these incidents might have been due to innocent carelessness but hey, it was offensive to me.

cecilia, thanks for the lil' dedication to me, it meant a lot to me. more than you'll actually know. and thanks for going down to school to paint with me on your off day, knowing that's the only time in the week when you can actually rest. i know i can be a prick at times especially when i'm in the foulest of moods. but hey, i'm helping you build up your patience aye. Ha. remember, don't settle for anything less than you deserve yah...

by the way, to those who don't know and would like to know, i got into marketing while val's in tourism. the class which i was posted to is 02. so do lemme know if you happen to be in the same class as me yah.

gotta go and stress myself out now. take care and see ya